Fairy Tales Don't Always Happen
3 Years ago, i used to live in Los Angeles California. I was born and raised there until i was 14. Since i was a child i grew up with the kids i went to school with. My closest friends ended up going to the same middle school and high school that i went to. As a child i had always dreamed of going to prom. I used to see all my older cousins go and then talk about is as if it was the best night of their lives. Ever since then i pictured it as a magical day that i would enjoy very much. Let's just say fairy tales don't always happen. Turns out my parents separated and we moved away. Moving away was a crucial experience for me. I felt like everything i'd ever dream of and all those moments i pictured had just slipped away in an instant.
Indiana?
Why, was the question i constantly asked myself. I felt as if i were in the middle of nowhere. I hated the idea of moving to SouthBend Indiana. I finished my freshman year there and part of my sophomore year. After a while i didn't find it too bad. I had fit in perfectly. I had lots of friends and i was involved in various activities. Just when i was getting used to living there i come home one day to hear that we are moving again. Yes, AGAIN! I wasn't as upset as when i moved from California though. I was hoping that my mom would say we were moving back. The thing is, we don't always get what we want. Or maybe, just maybe we do.....
The Big Apple!!!
OK, we do! New York? I mean all i could think of was the fashion! I found it to be almost like California. Some adjustments were very complicated but i knew i would succeed, or so i thought. Getting to school of the future was scary. Everyone was so different. I was immediately judged and i had fit in but i wasn't comfortable.I switched amongst a couple of groups of friends. It just didn't seem right. NO matter where i went it just wasn't the same. All i could ever think of was my wonderful hometown, Los Angeles. As a whole i love New York and i plan to live here. However my high school experience was not the one i pictured. It definitely could have been better. I have met wonderful friends and have had great times though. On the other hand looking at pictures on facebook of my friends at prom from California caused me some tears. It hurt to see that i could have been in those pictures back home where my true friends were. My friends who i had spent most of my life with. I felt like when i moved here people had their friends already because they had known each other already. It was hard for me even though i get along with everyone.
What's The Whole Point!?
My point is that i am not looking forward to prom. It is this Thursday and to be quite honest i wished it would have been cancelled. This is not fair to say for others but i don't want to go. I always saw myself going but back home. Now that it is happening here it feels different. I will be going to prom but only because some of my close friends have asked me to. Problem is i haven't even found a prom dress yet. Thinking about prom made me realize that it will only be bad if i make it bad. So, i have to make the best out of this situation or it will be a disaster. On that note, I will try my best to let go and enjoy myself . Who knows, maybe it can turn out to be an unforgettable night.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Hw 56 - Culminating project comments
Comments on my project:
Natalie said:
NatalieK said...
Bryanna said...
RubenC said...
matt's political/personal blog said...
jessica c said...
ariel b. said...
ariel b. said...
ariel b. said...
ariel b. said...
Natalie said:
Ariel,
I thought your post was very funny. The images clearly displayed your reactions, while making the text more fun to read. I do wonder what made you go "huh" about the cremation facts. I do not find that information that surprising, as our society is evolving into a less religious state. I had never heard of resomation and it seems like an extremely cool idea. I believe it is clearly the most natural and should be made more widely known. I cannot say that I would particularly choose it, I want to be cremated I think, but it seems like a nice idea, that eventually you could help create a garden grow through your death.
I thought your post was very funny. The images clearly displayed your reactions, while making the text more fun to read. I do wonder what made you go "huh" about the cremation facts. I do not find that information that surprising, as our society is evolving into a less religious state. I had never heard of resomation and it seems like an extremely cool idea. I believe it is clearly the most natural and should be made more widely known. I cannot say that I would particularly choose it, I want to be cremated I think, but it seems like a nice idea, that eventually you could help create a garden grow through your death.
Bryanna said:
Hey Ariel,
I think your post is really funny. It made want to read your blog as well as good to watch. I think this is so you to make a joke into everything and have fun in life, so why wouldn't you have fun you death. Good Job.
I think your post is really funny. It made want to read your blog as well as good to watch. I think this is so you to make a joke into everything and have fun in life, so why wouldn't you have fun you death. Good Job.
Ruben said:
Ariel, I liked how you gave your perspective on death. Usually people are sad when death is around them, but you think the opposite. I would be sad if someone died, but I don't need to agree with you, for you to be correct.
Matt said:
Hey ariel, I really liked your post. It was full of color and it was fun to read. I liked that it was organized neatly into sections and the pictures made me want to continue reading. I think that if you put pictures of the cemeteries that would have been cool so people know what they are looking at and reading about. Other than that you did a great job.
Jessica said:
hey ariel i enjoyed reading your project. it was funny and at the same time very unique. it had the key ideas of what we learned in class along with a little more depth of what we learned. maybe next time you could focus a little more deeper on the stuff we didnt learn inside class
Comments i made:
To Natalie:
Intriguing Quotes:
-Having the person look perfect through embalming, the burial spot, the priest, everything added up in cost and would have to be perfect, in order to ensure a rightful passage into the next life.
- It is no longer such a monstrous thing that it must be kept from a child, but instead something that they need to acknowledge, even at a young age.
I liked your post because not only did you show changes in the industry regarding death but you also interviewed your parents with examples. It's very interesting how your parents both sort of saw death as something that needed to be perfect or rather monstrous. What do you think fueled them to think that? It is explicable with your father talking about how it's haunted but random with your mom. Maybe you can ask them why they think that. Over all i think you did a great job with your comparisons and details. Good job.
-Having the person look perfect through embalming, the burial spot, the priest, everything added up in cost and would have to be perfect, in order to ensure a rightful passage into the next life.
- It is no longer such a monstrous thing that it must be kept from a child, but instead something that they need to acknowledge, even at a young age.
I liked your post because not only did you show changes in the industry regarding death but you also interviewed your parents with examples. It's very interesting how your parents both sort of saw death as something that needed to be perfect or rather monstrous. What do you think fueled them to think that? It is explicable with your father talking about how it's haunted but random with your mom. Maybe you can ask them why they think that. Over all i think you did a great job with your comparisons and details. Good job.
To Bryanna:
You are very much right. An honest opinion is always great. I found what you said about peoples reactions to be humorous. Yet i agree some people might feel disrespected when you ask them questions like that. But have you wondered why? i think that it might be because they are scared of reality and prefer to ignore the fact that they will die. It was nice that you say you don't want others to be too worried about your death because your fun and funny. I feel the same way but since i know i like to give to others that's why i'd like resomation.
To Ruben:
When i read your project i noticed that your main point was how you thought that the deceased person wold be most happy if everything was perfect for their funeral. to support your opinion you followed through with quotes as evidence. It is hard to let one go and its sad but it doesn't have to be sad it can be really in any way as long as you accommodate the deceased. If you plan it then you can complete their last wishes so i concur. But i disagreee with the fact that you think it has to be perfect because no one is perfect but its up to you to make he best out of who you are.
To Jessica:
WOW! Is definitely my initial reaction. I have to say that your friend is a very strong individual. I can tell that her family is religious because my grandma is religious herself and a similar situation occurred when my great grandmother passed away. It must be difficult to talk about a recent death. I find it very brave of you to have asked her for an interview. Maybe something that would of made it a little more interesting could have been her initial reaction and or reactions. Great job though.
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Comment from mentor:
My mentor said:
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Hw - Culminating Project - Care of The Dead
I say:
"In my point of view, I do not think someone's death should keep you from doing what you normally do. I know that if i died instead of having people cry i want them to be happy for me. They should be happy for the memories we shared and because I got to accomplish a wonderful life. That being said my final perspective of dead is not a sad one, it is the final step of life, the big finish. You should cherish your last days and make them special. That being said, this brings me to my project. "
Well what is it!?!
My project will be five facts about care of the dead. Instead of making it plain i will add some flavor to it by putting gifs along with the facts. What is a gif? A gif is:"A popular format for image files, with built-in data compression." Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!
So, i come to class and find out we are going to be learning about care of the dead. And i told myself "more death?"
GIFSoup
Then Andy explains that it is different from the last unit and that we will learn about different funeral processes.
Me: (in relief) oh ok. yay!
GIFSoup
I learned a lot and will be sharing 5 facts that i found intriguing, and then my reaction.
Me: (smiles)
GIFSoup
Fact #1: In preparation of the deceased, the person is embalmed so that he or she looks intact. They dress the body, add make-up, and put on jewelry. Blood is removed and replaced with embalming fluid.
Me: I disagree! We should accept people's death and not have to change their image.
GIFSoup
Fact#2: There are 4 types of cemeteries.
GIFSoup
Fact#5:
Resomation: The recent study that shows a fast forward version of the natural process of decomposition. This liquid can be used as fertilizer on farms and gardens. "the body is sealed inside a vault-like tube filled with water and lye and steam-heated to 300 degrees. Three hours later, some powdery bone fragments and 200 gallons of fluid are all that remains."It doesn't lead to toxic chemicals. 80% less energy than standard cremation.
Me: What!! That is crazy! (shocked)
GIFSoup
Reflection, my final stance!
In this care of the dead unit there were a lot of things that we learned. It all started as bubbles and lead to our increase of knowledge. This unit was far more intriguing than the illness and dying unit. At first i had never thought about my death, but now i know what i want them to do with my body. I want my organs to be donated if useful, then i want my body to be resomated. The purpose behind that process is so that i feel like it wasn't useless at the end and it had a purpose. I could help benefit someone yet fertilize farms or gardens.
Me: LAUGHS OUT LOUD....
GIFSoup
The End!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU :)
(dances)
GIFSoup
"In my point of view, I do not think someone's death should keep you from doing what you normally do. I know that if i died instead of having people cry i want them to be happy for me. They should be happy for the memories we shared and because I got to accomplish a wonderful life. That being said my final perspective of dead is not a sad one, it is the final step of life, the big finish. You should cherish your last days and make them special. That being said, this brings me to my project. "
Well what is it!?!
My project will be five facts about care of the dead. Instead of making it plain i will add some flavor to it by putting gifs along with the facts. What is a gif? A gif is:"A popular format for image files, with built-in data compression." Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!
So, i come to class and find out we are going to be learning about care of the dead. And i told myself "more death?"
GIFSoup
Then Andy explains that it is different from the last unit and that we will learn about different funeral processes.
Me: (in relief) oh ok. yay!
GIFSoup
I learned a lot and will be sharing 5 facts that i found intriguing, and then my reaction.
Me: (smiles)
GIFSoup
Fact #1: In preparation of the deceased, the person is embalmed so that he or she looks intact. They dress the body, add make-up, and put on jewelry. Blood is removed and replaced with embalming fluid.
Me: I disagree! We should accept people's death and not have to change their image.
GIFSoup
Fact#2: There are 4 types of cemeteries.
- Modern Cemetery: It is spacious and landscaped-styled; it embodies the idea of state and rather than church controlled burial.
- Monumental Cemetery: Traditionally styled; where they have headstones or other monuments made of marble, granite, or similar materials that rise vertically from above the ground; contains maintenance practices.
- Lawn cemetery: It is covered in grass; each grave contains a commemorative plaque. Lawn setting: flowers, toys, grass, trees, and mowers.
- Natural cemetery aka eco-cemetery/green cemetery: new style; in a area set aside for natural burials(with or without coffins); they are motivated "by a desire to be environmentally conscious with the body rapidly decomposing and becoming part of the natural environment without incurring the environmental cost of traditional burials.
Fact#3:
Cremation: when a person is cremated they can be put in a columbarium wall. That is like a type of cemetery for cremated remains. They can be kept in urns at home by families or scattered in an attractive place as well.
Me: Cool!
Fact#4:
Cremation rate is increasing. It has increased to 50% on the west coast and increasing more on east coast. Reasons for increase:
- This generation is less religious. Therefore, instead of a traditional funeral we now use cremation
- We all have to fly from far places sometimes to attend a funeral and don't have time to visit the tomb later. To avoid that you could cremate the body and bring it home.
- Last but not least, money!! the economy isn't great right now.
GIFSoup
Fact#5:
Resomation: The recent study that shows a fast forward version of the natural process of decomposition. This liquid can be used as fertilizer on farms and gardens. "the body is sealed inside a vault-like tube filled with water and lye and steam-heated to 300 degrees. Three hours later, some powdery bone fragments and 200 gallons of fluid are all that remains."It doesn't lead to toxic chemicals. 80% less energy than standard cremation.
Me: What!! That is crazy! (shocked)
GIFSoup
Reflection, my final stance!
In this care of the dead unit there were a lot of things that we learned. It all started as bubbles and lead to our increase of knowledge. This unit was far more intriguing than the illness and dying unit. At first i had never thought about my death, but now i know what i want them to do with my body. I want my organs to be donated if useful, then i want my body to be resomated. The purpose behind that process is so that i feel like it wasn't useless at the end and it had a purpose. I could help benefit someone yet fertilize farms or gardens.
Me: LAUGHS OUT LOUD....
GIFSoup
The End!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU :)
(dances)
GIFSoup
Friday, May 6, 2011
Hw 52- Third Third Of The COTD Book
Mortician Diaries
Precis:
The last third of the Mortician Diaries was about her experiences as a mortician. She tells various stories. It gets more interesting towards the end because she shares insane situations within the mist of clients loosing loved ones or trying to understand it.
Quotes:
Analysis:
The mortician diaries was told by a funeral directors daughter who shares her career as a mortician by dividing book into two parts. Half of it was a guide book and the other half was about Nadle's mortician experiences. Personally i didn't find this book to be very intriguing. The only thing i liked were the stories in the third third because they were about her clients. I hated the beginning. She started out by showing how she cared to help sheep and who were deformed or abandoned. She then talks about this little lamb who she took care of all the time then was taken to get killed. She similarly then shares her experience of her cat giving birth to a deformed kitten. My point behind this is that her intro was very unexpected so it can either engage you making you wonder or disengage you. Overall it wasn't my favorite book and i definitely like the ending best.
Precis:
The last third of the Mortician Diaries was about her experiences as a mortician. She tells various stories. It gets more interesting towards the end because she shares insane situations within the mist of clients loosing loved ones or trying to understand it.
Quotes:
- "Farm teaches you a lot about the realities of life and death." (pg8)
- "She told me, "As the numbness faded, I was angry. I reached over and punched him on the arm. I told him dying on me was one thing. Leaving me with three teenage boys to raise was something else!" (pg59)
- "Sometimes we worry so much about our reputation that we put what others think before whats really important in life: the people we love most." (pg 102)
- "He counseled those assembled to remember that the quality of life was more important than the quantity.” (pg 94)
Analysis:
The mortician diaries was told by a funeral directors daughter who shares her career as a mortician by dividing book into two parts. Half of it was a guide book and the other half was about Nadle's mortician experiences. Personally i didn't find this book to be very intriguing. The only thing i liked were the stories in the third third because they were about her clients. I hated the beginning. She started out by showing how she cared to help sheep and who were deformed or abandoned. She then talks about this little lamb who she took care of all the time then was taken to get killed. She similarly then shares her experience of her cat giving birth to a deformed kitten. My point behind this is that her intro was very unexpected so it can either engage you making you wonder or disengage you. Overall it wasn't my favorite book and i definitely like the ending best.
Monday, May 2, 2011
HW 49 - Comments on Best of Your Break HW
Thinking/Writing Group:
Comment on Jessica's blog:
ariel b. said...
ariel b. said...
Bryanna said...
jessica c said...
d083c402-7533-11e0-ac2d-000bcdcb8a73 said...
Comment on Jessica's blog:
Pros: I thought your blog was interesting. I like that example your mom used "hit home". The fact that you asked them about what they want for themselves when they die was great. That was definitely something that i could have done to make my blog stronger.
Neutral: The Cherry on top could have been your perspective on how you want your body to be dealt with when you die.
Cons: Revise what you write before posting to make sure you don't have small grammatical errors.
Overall good job!
Neutral: The Cherry on top could have been your perspective on how you want your body to be dealt with when you die.
Cons: Revise what you write before posting to make sure you don't have small grammatical errors.
Overall good job!
Comment on Brendan's blog:
I noticed that religion was one of your main points. I enjoyed to know that you could back it up with examples of people who follow your religion and people who don't. Religion was a topic that took a big role in my post as well. I think that you are right, the reason why we do funerals is because of our religion. As a catholic i shared our family views on care of the dead. I have to say though, that i myself am not a very religious person. Thankfully i haven't had many members pass away. Nor have i been to any funerals.
Stupendous blog, i enjoyed it!
Stupendous blog, i enjoyed it!
Comment on Ruben's blog:
Moving on? I am not entirely sure what that feels like since i have never really experienced a death and have never been in a funeral. What i enjoyed most was that connection towards family tragedies. I know that is certainly true because i have seen it a lot in movies. Also, when my great grandmother died my grandmother would beat herself up over it. It was painful to see her suffer like that. Although i think that one should keep in mind that being born leads to death but its what you do in between to make it worth living.
To improve you should make it more descriptive. Maybe add more of the interview and some personal experiences. And small grammatical errors as well.
To improve you should make it more descriptive. Maybe add more of the interview and some personal experiences. And small grammatical errors as well.
Comment on Bryanna's blog:
Bryanna, i like how you always post yuou questions and answers from your interview. I have to say i stole your idea for my blog. Its seems like both your sister and mother have never really thought about how their funeral. Thank you for posting on my blog.
Allwyn said he didn't do a post so i didn't comment.
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Comment Received From Bryanna:
I love how you talked about the way that you thought about it , how everyone around you thinks about and how philosophy looks at it. I feel that you had a lot of important things to say and point out. Like how "Luckily up to date i haven't had a close family member pass away"
you could still imagine how other people would feel and feel with death.
Comment Received From Jessica:
i think that it was personally very smart to ask someone who is pretty old. (no offense). but i think they are one of the best people to ask for adivce and wisdom about a lot of topics. because i personally feel like they have a lot of personal experience with stuff and have a lot of knowledge. things have changed over the years so i think that they have seen those changes and could understand it better than us. so by going to your grandma, i think she had a lot of personal insights about the care of the dead. nice job.
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Comment From Mentor:
Comment From My Mentor:
Ariel's Mentor
The interview pertaining to death featuring the writer's grandmother brought upon varies emotions and cultural traditions. The step by step process involving the aftermath of death demonstrated to be a highlight within the interview. The justification presented by the grandmother concerning her mother's death appeared dubious without further interrogation. That being said, the quote pertaining to the equality of death without giving privilege to any particular race or financial stability of an individual demonstrated the comprehension of such a delicate topic by the interviewee. Furthermore, the organization of the interview was concise and lucid bringing about credit to the writer.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
HW 48 - Family Perspectives on the Care of the Dead (comment here)
The Situation:
I don't have many family members who i can get a perspective from on the care of the dead. When it came down to interviewing the only one who was around was my grandma. I wasn't sure if i should ask her about the care of the dead since my great grandmother who passed away was her mother. My grandmother helped her a lot, she was the one who helped her the most despite the way that her mother would treat her.Not that it was terrible because everyone has a rocky relationship with their parents but my grandma did go through the most.
Interview With Grandma: Her Perspective, Word For Word!
Questions:
I don't have many family members who i can get a perspective from on the care of the dead. When it came down to interviewing the only one who was around was my grandma. I wasn't sure if i should ask her about the care of the dead since my great grandmother who passed away was her mother. My grandmother helped her a lot, she was the one who helped her the most despite the way that her mother would treat her.Not that it was terrible because everyone has a rocky relationship with their parents but my grandma did go through the most.
Interview With Grandma: Her Perspective, Word For Word!
Questions:
- How do you perceive death?
- What is the custom? Does our family follow it?
- What is the reasoning behind these customs in your perspective?
- What is a strength and weakness about death?
- Does our family pay respect to the dead in a certain way?
Answers:
- I like to see it as something pretty yet ugly. Its pretty because death can't distinguish, in other words it doesn't discriminate. It takes the rich, the poor, and people of all races. I see it ugly because it takes you with out your consent as well as your loved ones.
- The catholic custom consists of 3 parts: bringing the body home to stay up with it all night, a mass, and a funeral. Yes, we do. We actually are very good at paying respect to the dead.
- Reasoning behind bringing the body home: You stay up with the body all night because it's the last night with the person pushing up daisies. Reasoning behind church: Making a last mass is a custom for catholics because that is their religion and we help the person who is dead too be forgiven all of their sins. Also the family has to pray a rosary for 9 days. Reasoning behind the funeral: A funeral is given to the deceased person so that he/she can rest in peace. I think that we all go to heaven once we die. Also since god had a reincarnation i have a feeling we will all reincarnate one day. <---- DEEP!!
- A weakness from death is the pain that we suffer to see our beloved die, or leaving without wanting to. A strength is that the person will now rest in peace with god.
- Our family pays respect to the dead. During the day of the dead we make a shrine for our loved ones. We dedicate the whole day to them and turn on a candle/pray so that all of their sins are forgiven. Also, we take them flowers to their tombstone. It can be a day full of regrets for some because you don't know what you have until you have lost it. You will always think why you didn't do this or why did i say that?
WOAH! That was my first reaction. And my first thought was: "The older the wiser". I couldn't have picked a better to interview. When my grandmother was speaking i was touched and amazed by her insight on care of the dead.
Favorite Deep Quotes:
A Shocking Yet Understanding Reaction:
After i interviewed my grandmother i thought to myself whether i should try to interview about her mother or not. I decided to go for it because the i would at least know i tried asking. There i go: " Grandma, do you mind me asking about your mother?" Her Reaction: " No! No no no no no! Don't dare to ask me about my mother. That is a very sentimental experience and it's personal. No! I don't want to share. Is that it? Because i'm done. Go on." I was speechless i didn't know how to react so i apologized and walked out. She went from being super calm to a scary tone. Her hands were shaking and she looked very angry. I couldn't really sleep that night and i felt terrrible. :(
Favorite Deep Quotes:
- death can't distinguish, in other words it doesn't discriminate. It takes the rich, the poor, and people of all races. I see it ugly because it takes you with out your consent as well as your loved ones.
- A funeral is given to the deceased person so that he/she can rest in peace. I think that we all go to heaven once we die. Also since god had a reincarnation i have a feeling we will all reincarnate one day.
- It can be a day full of regrets for some because you don't know what you have until you have lost it. You will always think why you didn't do this or why did i say that?
A Shocking Yet Understanding Reaction:
After i interviewed my grandmother i thought to myself whether i should try to interview about her mother or not. I decided to go for it because the i would at least know i tried asking. There i go: " Grandma, do you mind me asking about your mother?" Her Reaction: " No! No no no no no! Don't dare to ask me about my mother. That is a very sentimental experience and it's personal. No! I don't want to share. Is that it? Because i'm done. Go on." I was speechless i didn't know how to react so i apologized and walked out. She went from being super calm to a scary tone. Her hands were shaking and she looked very angry. I couldn't really sleep that night and i felt terrrible. :(
Saturday, April 16, 2011
HW 46 - Initial Thoughts on the Care of the Dead
My Experiences:
Luckily up to date i haven't had a close family member pass away. The only Family member that i can remember passing away is my great grandma. Knowing she was gone hurt but not as much as i though it would. Memories shared with her are few. She was the person who taught me my first prayers and a couple of songs. Even now i still remember everything she taught me and i am very appreciative of it. I have taught some of them to my younger sisters. Later on she was living with us for about a year. I wasn't around her much being that i was occupied with school and sports but enough to at least know what she was about. On a random night one day they called us and gave us the bad news. I cried for like a couple of days but i was too young too comprehend what exactly it meant to lose someone. What i did know is that based off of my grandmothers and mothers emotions, it must be a heartache to know that someone can be here and then gone within a matter of seconds. I look back to the memories i shared with her and they make me smile. Sometimes i wish i could go back in time and done things differently to have spent more time with her.
The Way I Was Taught To Perceive Dead People:
Growing up as i mentioned above, didn't involve much death. I can't really state that there is a specific way to view it. What i do know are a couple of customs based off of my great grandmothers death. When she passed away we had to bury her for her to rest in peace. My great grandmother always mentioned how she would be happiest being buried in her hometown. Immediately we all knew that thats where we would have to take her in order to complete her desire. Also to pay respect i learned that i had to wear black and that i shouldn't listen to music or things i would normally do. I however don't agree.
My Philosophy:
I think that death is a part of life. We shouldn't have to treat it differently. As long as we savor the memories and cherish them we shouldn't have to do certain things to explain our pain to others. I feel like doing so is like feeling pity for the person who died and that is disrespectful. One should not feel pity because the person who passed away gave all they had and shared beautiful memories that will last a lifetime. We should all do what we normally do and dress how we normally dress because i am sure that the dead person would like us to be happy and not sad. So why be sad? Pay respect for a day and once they are resting in peace continue with your life as i know they would like you to. Think about how you want people to react to your death. I am not saying you can't be affected or hurt by it because they play a role in your life. All i'm saying is that you shouldn't spend your life stuck on that moment because this experience will make you stronger. Perhaps it will make you a better person.
Luckily up to date i haven't had a close family member pass away. The only Family member that i can remember passing away is my great grandma. Knowing she was gone hurt but not as much as i though it would. Memories shared with her are few. She was the person who taught me my first prayers and a couple of songs. Even now i still remember everything she taught me and i am very appreciative of it. I have taught some of them to my younger sisters. Later on she was living with us for about a year. I wasn't around her much being that i was occupied with school and sports but enough to at least know what she was about. On a random night one day they called us and gave us the bad news. I cried for like a couple of days but i was too young too comprehend what exactly it meant to lose someone. What i did know is that based off of my grandmothers and mothers emotions, it must be a heartache to know that someone can be here and then gone within a matter of seconds. I look back to the memories i shared with her and they make me smile. Sometimes i wish i could go back in time and done things differently to have spent more time with her.
The Way I Was Taught To Perceive Dead People:
Growing up as i mentioned above, didn't involve much death. I can't really state that there is a specific way to view it. What i do know are a couple of customs based off of my great grandmothers death. When she passed away we had to bury her for her to rest in peace. My great grandmother always mentioned how she would be happiest being buried in her hometown. Immediately we all knew that thats where we would have to take her in order to complete her desire. Also to pay respect i learned that i had to wear black and that i shouldn't listen to music or things i would normally do. I however don't agree.
My Philosophy:
I think that death is a part of life. We shouldn't have to treat it differently. As long as we savor the memories and cherish them we shouldn't have to do certain things to explain our pain to others. I feel like doing so is like feeling pity for the person who died and that is disrespectful. One should not feel pity because the person who passed away gave all they had and shared beautiful memories that will last a lifetime. We should all do what we normally do and dress how we normally dress because i am sure that the dead person would like us to be happy and not sad. So why be sad? Pay respect for a day and once they are resting in peace continue with your life as i know they would like you to. Think about how you want people to react to your death. I am not saying you can't be affected or hurt by it because they play a role in your life. All i'm saying is that you shouldn't spend your life stuck on that moment because this experience will make you stronger. Perhaps it will make you a better person.
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